Share

This week was a busy one for me, so this post will be a bit on the shorter side. But here we go:

One of the most exhausting pressures our kids face today is the demand to define themselves. The world tells them their identity is something they must discover, express, and constantly curate.

Alan Noble puts it plainly:

“If I belong to myself, then I am the only one who can set limits on who I am or what I can do. No one else has the right to define me, to choose my journey in life, or to assure me that I am okay.”1

And because we’ve abandoned the idea of a God-given identity, our kids are left trying to make one up. Often, that means presenting a version of themselves that is lovable, impressive, or different enough to feel special.

You see it in social media personas, in fashion trends, in the obsession with being "authentic." But even authenticity has its limits. Our culture only applauds your authenticity when it fits the cultural script.

Tim Keller gives a helpful illustration. Imagine a young man in medieval Europe who finds inside himself to sinful impusles, he feels both violent and attracted to the same sex. At that cultural moment, he would most likely suppress the attraction and celebrate his aggression, because that’s what his culture celebrated as noble. Now fast forward to New York City today. That same young man would be encouraged to suppress his aggression and express his sexual desires.2

What changed? The heart? No, the cultural script did. When identity is rooted in the self, it becomes a game of choosing which feelings to validate based on what society applauds at the moment.

That’s why the pressure to be "your authentic self" is so heavy. It sounds freeing, but it’s actually another form of performance.

This is where Christian identity is so different.

Peter reminds believers:

“You are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession… Once you were not a people, but now you are God’s people.” (1 Peter 2:9–10)

Our identity isn’t something we make up. It’s something we receive. We are created in God’s image, redeemed by Christ, and adopted into God’s family. That means our worth isn’t rooted in how we look, how we perform, or how others perceive us. It’s rooted in what God has done.

And if our kids don’t know that, they will spend their lives trying to earn it.

When identity becomes a project, even good things, like theology, interests, or political views, can just become more ways to define ourselves and compare ourselves to others. That’s why conversations online escalate so quickly. Disagreeing with someone’s opinion feels like attacking their core identity.

The solution isn’t to find a better identity within ourselves. It’s to receive the identity God has already given us in Christ.

Rebecca McLaughlin writes:

“If you are in Christ, you are loved not because of anything you’ve done, but because of what Jesus has done. You are not just accepted—you are adopted.”3

If our kids can rest in that truth, they will be less likely to fall for the lies that identity must be earned, customized, or performed.

So let’s remind them often:

• You are made in the image of God.

• You are loved by God.

• You are not your own. You belong to Christ.

This isn’t just good theology. It’s good news for weary hearts.

In a world that equates identity with sexuality and demands self-definition above all else, grounding our kids in a Christ-centered identity is one of the most important things we can do. If we don’t disciple them in who they are, the culture will gladly do it for us, and the results will be devastating. Understanding their identity in Christ is not just helpful; it is essential if they’re going to stand firm in a culture that is constantly trying to redefine them. And as we’ll see next week, the pressure to invent your own purpose in life is just as overwhelming. But the gospel offers hope there too.

(This blog post is adapted from a class I originally taught at Trinity Community Church as part of our series on parenting in a sexualized world. Some content has been edited for readability and format, but the core material reflects the teaching and discussion from that session.)

Share

If you think about it, we live in the most prosperous and peaceful era in the history of humanity. We have more comfort, more convenience, and more access to just about everything than any generation before us. And yet, our world feels more anxious, more isolated, and more confused than ever. It’s not just a feeling but the rates of anxiety, depression, and loneliness are soaring, especially among younger people.

Emily Esfahani Smith, in her book The Power of Meaning, puts words to what a lot of us sense: we’re in a crisis of meaning. People aren’t just looking for happiness, they’re longing for purpose, belonging, and identity. But here’s the problem. Her book’s subtitle is telling: "Crafting a Life That Matters." The whole idea is that it’s on each of us individually, to find our meaning and make life worthwhile.

That’s a crushing weight.

St. Augustine saw this long ago when he wrote, “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.1” Our kids are growing up in a world that tells them to be true to themselves and to follow their own truth. But apart from God, that freedom becomes a burden.It’s exhausting. The burden of self-belonging wears us down.

A lot of the things I say in this post, I’m drawing from Alan Noble’s work, especially his book You Are Not Your Own: Belonging to God in an Inhuman World, which speaks directly into this cultural pressure. He writes:

“To be your own and belong to yourself means that the most fundamental truth about existence is that you are responsible for your existence and everything it entails.”2

Think about that. If you belong only to yourself, then every decision, every failure, every achievement, it’s all on you. That doesn’t lead to peace. It leads to anxiety. And that’s not just a secular problem. If we’re not careful, Christian parents can subtly absorb this mindset too—feeling like we have to hold everything together, define our family’s meaning, and somehow raise kids who can survive the cultural storm on their own strength.

That’s why this part of our parenting series is focused on three deeply human questions:

1. Who do I belong to?

2. Who am I?

3. Why am I here?

This week, we’ll start by answering the first question.

Belonging: Who Do I Belong To?

Our kids are constantly hearing a message from the world: you belong to yourself. You get to decide what’s true. You get to choose who you are. No one else has a right to define you. That’s the air they breathe, from Disney songs and Instagram influencers to school policies and TikTok trends.

Thankfully, Scripture gives us a much better answer. The Heidelberg Catechism says:

“What is your only comfort in life and in death?”

“That I am not my own, but belong—body and soul, in life and in death—to my faithful Savior Jesus Christ.”

 —Heidelberg Catechism Q1

This is one of the most beautiful truths we can teach our children. We’re not drifting through life trying to figure it all out on our own. We are not our own. We are His. Paul reminds the Corinthians:

“You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:19–20)

That means we don’t have to invent our worth. We don’t have to perform to really matter. We don’t have to live under the illusion that we’re in charge of everything. Jesus bought us. He watches over us. And in Him, we can rest.

This truth is radically different from the cultural script:

• If I belong to myself, I set the rules.

• If I belong to myself, I define my truth.

• If I belong to myself, I bear the weight of creating my own meaning.

What sounds like freedom is really an unbelievable burden to carry. But when we know we belong to Christ:

• We are secure.

• We are known.

• We are loved.

Tim Keller often pointed out that modern identity is fragile because it’s based on performance. In today’s world, you’re only as good as your last success. But when your identity is grounded in belonging to Christ, you’re freed from that treadmill. You don’t have to constantly prove yourself.

Rebecca McLaughlin puts it this way: “If you are in Christ, you are loved not because of anything you’ve done, but because of what Jesus has done. You are not just accepted—you are adopted.3”

Belonging to Christ is not just a theological truth. It’s a daily anchor. And it’s one our kids need more than ever. Because they’re growing up in a world that tells them, subtly and loudly, that they belong to no one but themselves.

But we know better. We were made for more. We were made for Him.

“You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.” —St. Augustine

When we don’t know who we belong to, we’re left to define ourselves however we can. That’s why identity becomes such a battlefield in our cultural moment. And if we think we have to make up our own identity from scratch, we’ll always feel like we’re falling short. We’ll become either proud or crushed or both, depending on the day.

And if we believe we exist for ourselves, we’ll either chase shallow pleasures or carry an unbearable weight to make our lives count. Either way, we’ll miss the joy and rest that come from living out of our God-given purpose.

So yes, the world is telling our kids they are their own, but the gospel tells a better story. And that better story starts with belonging.

Over the next two weeks, we’ll talk about what it means to help our children find their identity in Christ and how to teach them that their purpose is bigger than themselves.

This past week, the New York Times published an article titled “Is It Ok For Your Kids to ‘Rot’ All Summer”. The premise is that parents are debating how their kids should spend their time this summer. Should they structure every minute of the summer, or should they instead give their children the freedom to have an unstructured summer, which they refer to as “kid rotting”? 

As a millennial parent and a child of the 90s, this debate resonates with me. In the case of my family, this summer has been different than any other summer. For the first time since we are parents, both my wife and I have schedules filled with work responsibilities, and though we are thankful for jobs that offer some type of flexibility, this summer has been uniquely challenging. As millennial parents, our instinct is to want to provide a perfectly structured summer filled with activities that would challenge our children artistically, physically, intellectually, and most importantly, spiritually. But as children of the 90’s we also recognize that there is some value in unstructured times of boredom. Some of my most precious memories come from times of boredom that sparked creative (and admittedly at times foolish) ways to have fun with our siblings, cousins, and friends. 

There is a felt pressure to enroll our children in every enriching activity even when it stretches the family budget. Not every household can afford costly camps or lessons and there should be no shame for families who simply cannot do those things. Whatever we decide must flow from faith not fear or comparison.

So what does the Bible say about how our children should spend these months? Every family and every child is different but three biblical principles can guide us as we plan: stewarding time as a gift, embracing God blessed rest and creating space for creative flourishing.

Stewarding Time as a Gift

Jesus told the story of a master who entrusted his servants with talents and held each one accountable for how they used them (Matthew 25:14–30). Time is our most precious resource. Ephesians 5:15–17 urges us to live wisely and make the most of every opportunity. When we teach our children to see each hour as a gift from God we help them learn responsibility and intentionality.

In practice, this might mean a short family devotion each morning (or before going to bed, which is what we do at home), or being intentional with chores or acts of service, something like watering plants or helping a neighbor. These routines reinforce that time belongs to God and every moment can honor Him. Psychologists note that when children view unstructured moments as chances for meaningful choice rather than empty voids, they develop stronger self-regulation and executive-function skills.

Not only is time a gift from God, but how we use it is also a means of worship. Our kids need to remember that Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 10:31 that whether we eat or drink, or whatever we do, we should do it all to the glory of God.

Embracing God Blessed Rest

One of the temptations of the age we live in is to understand rest as laziness. Rest is not laziness. It is a divine gift woven into creation. On the seventh day God rested and declared it holy (Genesis 2:2–3). Jesus reminded his critics that the Sabbath was made for our good (Mark 2:27). True rest refreshes body and soul and teaches us we do not earn our worth through constant performance.

With that said, even though rest is not sinful, idleness is. The first is a God-ordained pause; the second is an undisciplined drift. Proverbs 24:30–34 warns against the house of a “sluggard” whose field has overgrown with thorns, symbolizing the consequences of prolonged inactivity. While rest replenishes, idleness stagnates. Teaching children the difference helps them grow in both Sabbath-keeping and diligence. It also protects them from the result of idleness, which is more sin. 

At my wife’s request, this summer we have gone on a few walks after dinner (she loves them, the rest of us not so much).But these walks remind us that a little boredom is healthy. Research shows that tolerating unstructured time strengthens emotional stamina and sparks creativity. In that quiet space children learn to soothe themselves and discover new ideas.

Cultivating Creative Flourishing

God has given each child unique gifts, musical, athletic, artistic or academic (1 Corinthians 12:4–7). Proverbs 22:6 encourages us parents to train up our children in the way they should go. In childhood we lay the groundwork for lifelong curiosity and character.

Unstructured play is where imaginations take flight. A cardboard box becomes a spaceship. A blanket fort transforms into a castle. Those spontaneous inventions teach risk taking, problem solving and independence. Paul commended Timothy’s sincere faith nurtured from childhood through Scripture (2 Timothy 3:14–15). We can blend playful freedom with simple spiritual habits such as praying before play or reflecting on a Bible story at bedtime.

Putting It All Together

A flourishing summer is not an endless to-do list nor a season of true neglect. It is a prayerful rhythm of moments: shared devotion, simple work, free play and genuine rest.

This week take a few minutes to sketch a loose daily rhythm. Perhaps begin mornings with five minutes of Bible reading over breakfast. Midmorning, include a household task or service. After lunch, give children unstructured play time outdoors. In the late afternoon read aloud or go for a walk. Keep dinners device-free and end the day with a brief prayer or family reflection.

Trust God with the gaps. He designed work and rest, challenge and boredom to shape our children’s hearts. As we steward summer wisely, grounded in Scripture and grace, our kids will not rot but flourish, growing in creativity, resilience and wonder to the glory of the One who holds every season in his hands.

Share

Share

Earlier today, as we were driving home, my daughter hit me with some questions about Pride Month. I don’t know how it is in your home, but every time June rolls around, our dinner table fills with questions about rainbow flags, about Pride displays at the store, and at times about things they heard from friends about the topic. And often, these conversations catch me off guard. I’m not afraid to talk about these things, and I believe it needs to be an ongoing conversation, but it still makes me nervous at times. Maybe you’ve felt the same tension: wanting to answer with clarity, but also with kindness. Wanting to stay faithful to God’s truth, while showing the love of Christ.

If you’re anything like me, you don’t just want to keep your kids sheltered, you want to send them out prepared. You want to raise children who know what is true and how to love those who believe differently, standing courageously with a grace that only Christ can supply.

Here’s the good news: God hasn’t left us to figure this out alone. His Word gives us what we need, not only to navigate these conversations, but to do so in a way that communicates biblical love, not panic. We can stand firm in truth and extend the radical love of Jesus at the very same time. With the help of resources like Rachel Gilson’s Parenting Without Panic, this post is meant to help you think through how to walk that path with your children, not perfectly, but faithfully,  with eyes fixed on Christ.

Point to the beauty of God’s Good Design: Build a Biblical Foundation Early

The first thing we need to do as parents is to build a biblical foundation for our children. As parents, we should not just react to cultural narratives but intentionally teach our children the beauty of God’s design for gender and sexuality. 

Rachel Gilson puts it this way: “God’s vision for our bodies and relationships really is good news, and we can talk calmly and confidently about it with even our young kids.” — Rachel Gilson

So, our priority as parents is to help our children see their body, gender, and sexuality as inherently good and God-given. For those of us who grew up during the Purity Culture movement, this can feel difficult. Though it started with the good desire to teach us to honor God with our bodies, it often left many young believers feeling ashamed of their bodies or unsure about how to talk about their body and sexuality.

This can at times be difficult for those in my generation that were brought up in Purity Culture that even though ultimately started with a desire to train us to honor God with our bodies, unintentionally lead many young believers to either be ashamed of their bodies or sexuality or to make them blush when thinking about it. 

As Sam Alberry says “Culture says, ‘You are your sexuality.’ Scripture says, ‘You are God’s.’ Your identity is not determined by your sexual feelings but by God’s creative and redemptive work.” and “God made our bodies, redeemed them through Christ, and will one day raise them to life again. Our bodies are of eternal significance.”

This truth is all over Scripture starting in Genesis all the way to the New Testament where Paul reminds the Corinthians not only that their bodies are a temple, but also that because of the Cross, they have been bought with a price. 

“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” -1 Corinthians 6:19–20 (ESV)

A positive vision of sexuality rooted in creation gives us and our children a firm footing in a world of shifting identities. By teaching them early that God’s design is not just true but beautiful, we equip them to withstand cultural confusion.

Embrace Grace and Truth: Standing Firm Without Fighting Dirty

I don’t know about you, but I am exhausted by the culture wars. Culture wars happen when different groups in society argue over big questions about what is right and wrong, things like family, marriage, and identity. These debates often get loud and heated but rarely yield any results.

In a world that is already saturated with us vs. them fights in every arena, we need to resist the pull towards combativeness and instead model how biblical truth and Christ-like love are intrinsically linked. Our goal is to be faithful witnesses who neither compromise truth nor withhold compassion.

And sometimes even within the church, we unintentionally absorb an “us vs. them” mindset. Growing up, I often got the impression, perhaps not deliberately taught, that the LGBTQ community was the enemy. The Gospel, on the other hand, tells me to love my neighbor. So as we equip our children to have these conversations, we need to model how to stand firm but without neglecting our call to love others as we love ourselves.  

As Jackie Hill Perry says “The gospel hurts and heals all at the same time.” It is a fact that upholding a biblical sexual ethic will be offensive to some, but let the offense come from the truth and not from us. 

During my time in ministry, I have seen many young men and women who struggled with their sexuality who refused to talk to their parents about it because they had heard the way they spoke of the LGBTQ community, and they feared they would be shunned. The worst part was that often they were right. 

Paul again says “Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.” — Ephesians 4:15

When we act like Paul instructs us, we are not only loving our neighbor as Christ would want us to, but we are also opening the door to our children if they ever find themselves with questions about their sexuality.

Truth and love are not competing virtues but twin realities in Christ. As we navigate cultural confusion, we are called to hold fast to God’s Word while displaying the gentleness and humility of Jesus.

Prioritize Identity in Christ: Freedom from the Lies of Self-Creation

The world says, “You are your sexuality,” but Scripture says, “You are who Christ says you are.” So as Christian parents we must teach our children that their deepest identity is not found in feelings or attractions but in being beloved by God.

Rebecca McLaughlin says:

“In Christ, one’s deepest identity is not who one loves, but Who one is loved by. The truest thing about an individual is that they are the beloved of God.” — Rebecca McLaughlin

The world is doing its best to shape the minds and hearts of our children, andWe must gently but persistently remind them: their worth isn’t found in their feelings or achievements but in the unchanging love of God. One of the throughlines of Disney movies, music, and video games is this idea that you have to shape your own identity and create your own path. 

But true freedom comes not from creating an identity but from receiving one. By rooting our children in the truth of who they are in Christ, we offer them a solid hope that cannot be shaken by cultural trends or personal struggles.

Parenting with Peace, Not Panic

I want to close with a reminder that as Christian parents, we are not called to panic but to persevere in the slow, faithful work of discipleship. Trusting in God’s sovereignty, we can courageously engage the cultural moment with unwavering truth and Christlike love, confident that God is at work.

The truth is, we will mess up. We will often put our foot in our mouths, and we won’t always have the right answer. And that’s ok. Because we are in Christ, we have the freedom to fail. And there is grace for that. We don’t have to be perfect because Christ is all the things we are not. The Word of God reminds us of this:

“The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” — Lamentations 3:22–23

Dear parent, be intentional,  but most importantly, seek to be faithful! Faithfulness in the small, daily conversations will bear fruit. Trust that as you plant seeds, the God who is always faithful will bring the growth, often slowly, but surely.

In the last few weeks, I have said a lot about screens and the digital world. Last week we talked about the importance of teaching our children discernment when interacting with what I called cultural artifacts such as movies, video games, and social media. In today’s post, I want to talk about an area that has been a constant struggle in my life as a believer: the area of self-control.

Self-control is listed as part of the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5. Peter also mentions it in his second letter when he says:

2 Peter 1:5-7 (ESV):

“For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love.”

It is clear from both of these passages that self-control is not just incidental in the life of the believer—it is presented as an important virtue of the Christian walk and a mark of spiritual maturity. In Peter’s progression, self-control is a result of faith and not a prerequisite to it. It builds upon the foundations of faith, virtue, and knowledge. This is a reminder that self-control comes as a result of understanding and believing God’s truth.

This passage also reminds us that self-control precedes godliness. In his book Your Future Self Will Thank You, Drew Dyck writes:

“Self-control isn’t just one good character trait, a nice addition to the pantheon of virtues. It’s foundational. Not because it’s more important than the other virtues, but because the others rely on it.” (p. 15)

If as parents we desire our children to grow into godliness, it is imperative that we teach them to grow in self-control.

Screen Time Is a Good Metric of Self-Control

I confess that growing in self-control has been a lifelong struggle in my spiritual walk. I am constantly having to confess a lack of self-control and relying on God’s grace to grow in it. For me, different markers remind me of where I am spiritually: my mood, my energy levels, even the numbers on the scale can reveal much about my heart. Everyone has different struggles, but a tool that seems to be almost universal as an indicator of our lack of self-control is our screen time.

Every Sunday morning, my phone pings me with a notification that tells me how much time I spent on it that week. It’s honestly embarrassing, but it is a helpful reminder that I am addicted to screens.

My kids don’t have smartphones, and they probably won’t until they’re sixteen (for more on the impact of screens and social media on the mental health of teenagers, read Jonathan Haidt’s The Anxious Generation). But my wife and I do have control over how much screen time they have every day. We’re one week into summer break, so we are still finding our sweet spot, but as parents we have the ability, and responsibility, to limit their screen time.

Guided by biblical wisdom, we must model and teach self-control by setting clear and consistent boundaries around screen time and content. This isn’t about punishment, but about training children in the discipline of self-governance.

It is important to remember that self-control is not merely about restriction. It is a fruit of spiritual maturity. Science tells us that the human prefrontal cortex doesn’t fully develop until early adulthood. Our children need our help with limits and decision-making. Restriction can modify behavior, but it cannot change the heart, which is ultimately what we desire.

So how can we help our children grow in this area?

Offer Exciting Alternatives

One of the most helpful things we can do for our kids is to fill their lives with things that are genuinely life-giving instead of just letting screens take over. Let's actively encourage activities that get their bodies moving, their minds thinking, and their hearts engaged. Think playing outside, diving into a great book, getting creative with art, or finding ways to serve others. The point isn't to outlaw fun, but to show them that the most lasting kind of joy usually comes from things that require a little effort and imagination. When we pack their days with rich, meaningful experiences, it naturally leaves less room for that mindless scrolling or gaming.

Help Them See Relationships Matter More Than Entertainment

Let's be honest, screens are often the easy default, but they're almost never the best choice. We need to gently guide our children to understand that being with people is simply more valuable than whatever's happening on a screen. Help them see how much it matters to truly be present with others, whether it's laughing over a board game with a sibling, lending a hand to a parent with chores, or just sitting down and really talking. These real-life connections are far more important than the next YouTube video or Fornite season.

Most importantly, the relationship they need to prioritize most is not horizontal but vertical. Their relationship with God. So we should teach our children to create rhythms that look up before they look around. They can do this by spending time in prayer and by reading Scripture.

 It really echoes what Jesus taught, doesn't it? The two most important things are loving God and loving our neighbor (Matthew 22:37–39). Putting relationships first isn't just a nice idea; it's right at the heart of following Jesus and provides the perfect training ground for learning to manage ourselves.

Model Self-Control (This is a Big One!)

Our kids learn so much more from watching what we do than from hearing what we say. If we're talking about self-control but our own lives look like a free-for-all, our words won't carry much weight. So, let them see us putting our phones away during family meals. Let them see us choosing to read a book instead of binge-watching a show. Let them see us intentionally taking a break, maybe a "digital Sabbath," from devices. And hey, don't be afraid to talk about your own struggles with this stuff and how much you need God's grace! Show them that self-control isn't just about following a list of rules; it's about living our whole lives surrendered to Christ. I just declared our dining room a screen-free zone, not because my kids are using screens during dinner, but because I often find myself checking text messages or email when my attention should be on my family.

It’s like that verse in Titus reminds us, God's amazing grace trains us to say no to ungodly desires and live lives that are self-controlled, upright, and devoted to Him right here, right now (Titus 2:11–12).

A Final Thought

Ultimately, self-control isn't just some skill we're trying to hammer into our kids. It's something we pray the Holy Spirit will grow within them. And as we're trying our best to guide them, let's keep reminding ourselves that true self-control doesn't come from sheer willpower alone. It grows from staying connected to Jesus, who showed us perfectly what it looks like to live a life of joyful surrender to His Father.

The day I started writing this post was the last day of school for my children. For my son, it was his last day of elementary school. Just like that, my kids are no longer little. At 7 and 11, their interests are changing. Especially for my oldest, little kid toys are starting to lose their appeal. These days, playing games online with his friends is more exciting than building with blocks or playing with action figures.

Because both my wife and I work, even though we’ve planned camps and activities for the summer, the reality is that our kids will have more time at home, and with that comes more opportunities for screen time. And that’s okay. We’ve made peace with the fact that screens will be part of our summer. But I also want to be intentional about how my kids think about their relationship with screens.

In a recent post, I described technology like a vine. Without a trellis to guide it, it grows wild, creeping into places it was never meant to go. In the same way, if we don’t help our kids build a framework for how to interact with technology, it will find its way into every corner of life without asking permission.

If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you’re a young Gen X-er, a Millennial, or maybe an older Gen Z-er. That means, like me, you probably remember growing up during the tail end of the "satanic panic." I was raised in Guatemala, and even there, the influence reached us. I remember the way many in the church reacted to culture. Out of a sincere desire to protect their children, a lot of parents responded by banning just about everything. Good music was off-limits. Every TV show was suspect. Unless it was McGee and Me or The Flying House, it was treated like a spiritual threat.

I’m only half joking. There really was a tendency to see every cultural artifact as dangerous. And to be honest, as much as I rolled my eyes as a kid when I wasn’t allowed to watch certain shows or play certain games, now that I’m a parent, I get it. I want to protect my kids, too. The impulse is there. But now I find myself asking a different question: Is isolation really the answer? Or would it be better to train my kids to think, to discern, and to engage with the world through the lens of Scripture?

Teach them to recognize that everything is a sermon

One of the best tools we can give our children is the ability to recognize that everything in culture is preaching. Songs, commercials, movies, video games, YouTube shorts, each one is saying something about what is true, good, and beautiful. The Apostle Paul says in Romans 12:2,

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect."

Paul assumes the world is trying to shape us. That is the default. Whether it is loud and obvious or subtle and slow, the world is constantly forming us. But Paul does not just diagnose the problem; he gives us a path forward: the renewing of our minds. And that renewal comes through testing and discerning what aligns with God's will. That kind of wisdom is not automatic. It has to be taught and practiced.

Our kids are being formed constantly, not just during family devotions or Sunday school, but in the everyday choices of what they watch, listen to, and follow. As James K.A. Smith has put it, we are shaped not just by what we know, but by what we love. So part of our job as parents is to help our children pay attention to what is shaping their affections.

There is one voice that stands above all the others, the voice of God in Scripture. And when our kids know how to listen for that voice, they are better equipped to respond wisely to all the others.

Asking questions about cultural artifacts

One of the most practical ways we can help our children grow in discernment is by teaching them to ask questions about the things they watch, listen to, and enjoy. Not every movie or show needs to be avoided, but every one of them should be examined. Even when something is fun or engaging, it is still saying something about the world, about people, and about what matters most.

Recently, our family watched Wicked. My kids love the music, and my daughter will correct you if you do not sing the lyrics exactly right. As we were watching it, I paused the movie and asked, "Is there anything here that does not seem right?" One of my kids noted that the clothing did not seem gender-appropriate. Then I asked, "What sermon is this story preaching?" To my surprise, their answers were thoughtful and perceptive. That moment reminded me that discipleship does not only happen during devotions. It occurs in conversations like these.

These conversations do not need to be complicated. They can happen during a car ride or while unloading the dishwasher. The goal is to help our children become thoughtful and wise, to show them how to think Christianly about the media they enjoy. We are not trying to raise critics. We are trying to raise worshippers who can recognize what honors God and what quietly pulls their hearts away from him.

The Bible encourages this kind of reflection. In 1 Thessalonians 5:21, Paul says, "Test everything; hold fast what is good." That kind of testing includes the stories and songs that shape our imaginations and desires.

Here are a few simple questions to help get the conversation started:

• What message is this story or song trying to send?

• Who is the hero, and what are they fighting for?

• What kind of actions or values are celebrated?

• Does this help me love God and others more or less?

• Is there any truth in this that matches what the Bible says?

• Is there anything here that feels like a subtle lie?

In her book Parenting Without Panic, Rachel Gilson gives a great example of this. When her daughter asked about the same-sex romantic relationships in the show She-Ra, Rachel explained that God does not exist in that fictional world, so people live differently. It was a thoughtful and honest way to acknowledge that not every story reflects the truth of God's world. And it opened a door to talk about what God actually says.

Helping our kids ask these kinds of questions will not make them fearful or overly cautious. It will help them become wise. It will shape their hearts to love truth, to see through lies, and to grow in confidence that God's Word really is the best lens through which to view everything else.

Who is shaping your heart, thoughts, and desires?

Another vital question our kids need to hear often is: "Who is shaping your heart?" The people and voices we listen to most, whether it is a friend, a favorite YouTuber, or the latest trend on social media, do not just fill our time. They shape our hearts. What captures our attention eventually forms our desires.

Proverbs 4:23 reminds us, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."

This is not just a warning. It is a call to intentional formation. The heart is the control center of our life, and the voices we listen to play a powerful role in shaping what we love and what we live for.

Tony Reinke, in his book Competing Spectacles: Treasuring Christ in the Media Age, writes:

"The Christian's high calling is to guard the heart and its loves and desires. The worst trade in the universe is playing in the shallow pools of the world's spectacles instead of diving deep for the treasure of eternal worth."

As parents, it is not enough to tell our kids to guard their hearts. We have to model it. If we are constantly distracted by our phones, absorbed in shallow media, or anxious to keep up with cultural noise, our children will follow our example far more than our instruction.

Here are a few simple questions to help your children think about the voices shaping them:

• Who do I listen to most during the week?

• Am I placing another voice in the place of authority that belongs to the Bible alone?

• Do the things I watch or hear make me love Jesus more or less?

• What voice do I hear first in the morning: God's Word or the world's noise?

Jesus said, "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also" (Matthew 6:21). Our task is not just to limit screen time but to help our kids treasure Christ above all. That begins with asking the right questions and living them out ourselves.

Conclusion

At the heart of all of this is a call to follow Jesus more closely. Screens are not the enemy, but they can easily distract us from what matters most. Our children do not just need rules. They need a vision of life where Christ is more beautiful than anything a screen can offer. As we disciple them in how to engage the world with wisdom and truth, we do it with our eyes fixed on Jesus, who alone can satisfy the desires of the heart.

One of the questions I have to deal with often, not only as a pastor but also as a parent, is the question of what the place is for screens in the life of my family? In the world we live in, screens are inevitable. The debate is no longer whether our kids will have access to screens, but when and how they will have access to screens? By screens, I mean not only the devices like TV’s, computers, tablets, cell phones, etc… but the content that comes through the pieces of glass we so adore.

In the zeitgeist, the term black mirror has become commonplace. The term was coined by Charlie Brooker, a TV producer. The moment your smartphone, tablet, or TV screen goes dark and you see your own reflection staring back at you? That’s a black mirror. Brooker has explained that the term itself refers to these screens that dominate our lives. When they’re off, they become eerie, lifeless mirrors. We all know exactly what he is talking about. We have all seen the distorted reflection of our face when the phone or tablet turns off. The problem is that these machines also have the ability to distort the way we view ourselves, our neighbor, and life in general. 

Over the next several weeks, we’ll explore topics like setting healthy screen rhythms, teaching discernment in a digital age, cultivating responsibility, and finding rest amidst digital distraction. Today, we start by addressing the foundational question: What exactly is the place for screens in a Christian home?

I. Screens Have a Place, But It’s Not the Center

In 1 Corinthians 6:12, Paul recites what many scholars believe was a well-known saying in Corinthian culture: “All things are lawful for me.” But he immediately qualifies it by adding, “But not all things are helpful.” I remember growing up and latching onto that first part—the idea that I can do all things, that nothing is off limits. And it seems that was exactly the mindset in Corinth. That’s likely why Paul repeats the phrase twice in his letter. In chapter 6, he reminds the believers that just because something is permitted doesn’t mean it’s beneficial. Then later, in chapter 10, he sharpens the warning: don’t let your freedom lead to bondage. What begins as liberty can quietly become slavery. And that precisely is the warning we should heed when it comes to thinking about the place of screens in our home. 

In his book The Tech-Wise Family, Andy Crouch reminds us that technology is in its proper place when it exists on the “edges” of our family life, not at the center. But if your family is anything like mine, technology often behaves more like a vine. Without a trellis to guide it, it doesn’t stay put; it creeps into every corner of life, quietly taking over more than it should.

So, it is important that we find rhythms to fight against the encroachment of technology into the spaces that are meant to be centered on God and family. Screens should enrich family life and relationships, not isolate or fragment us. Families can intentionally create spaces and times where screens enhance connection (e.g., movie nights) rather than inhibit it (e.g., dinner table).

One of the rules my wife and I have discussed, but to be honest, I have yet to enforce consistently, is having no-screen spaces and times. At the Moscoso home, we treasure eating meals together as a family, but I have been guilty of allowing my phone and the tyranny of urgency and busyness to steal from me valuable time with my family. 

II. Screens Shape Our Hearts and Habits

Understanding the impact habits have on our hearts is foundational to the life of the believer. In his book The Common Rule, Justin Whitmel Earley says, “Habits are a pattern of repeated action that are ultimately formational (for good or bad, realized or not) and this, ultimately, is worship.” And yet, how often do you find yourself reaching out for your phone as the first action of your day? Whether we want it or not, this is a habit that shapes our hearts and desires.

I, personally, have to avoid looking at my phone before I pray or read Scripture. I know that the moment I reach for my phone, it’s game over. Our screens have the ability to reorient our attention and hearts. So it is a good diagnostic question to ask ourselves:, What is the first voice we listen to in the morning? 

This principle isn't merely about self-discipline; it's deeply theological. In Matthew 6:21, Jesus teaches us that "where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." What we give our attention to first and most frequently reveals and shapes what we treasure. When our children see us constantly drawn to our devices, we're inadvertently discipling them in what we truly value.(I’m preaching to myself here!)

Practically, we can fight this by finding ways to have fun together, apart from screens. In our household, for example, we love board games (Some of us love them, others tolerate them). So we often try to play board games together. It is amazing how board games reveal things about us. Even board games can provide discipleship moments. (Except Monopoly… that game is irredeemable.) 

The reality is that our digital habits form neural pathways that become increasingly difficult to redirect. This is why the Psalmist's commitment to "set no worthless thing before my eyes" (Psalm 101:3) speaks so powerfully to our digital age. As parents, we must recognize that screen use isn't neutral; it trains our desires and patterns of thought. Intentional habits and routines around screen use can help us and our children to guard our hearts and minds.

When establishing these rhythms feels challenging—and it will—remember that we're engaged in formation, not just restriction. Each time we choose Scripture before social media or family conversation before Netflix, we're actively participating in the Spirit's work of transformation described in Romans 12:2, refusing to be "conformed to this world" but instead being "transformed by the renewal of your mind."

III. Screens Must Serve, Not Master

One of the dangers of screens is that they can be tools that become masters. Instead of us using them, they capture us and enslave us. And one of the ways they can enslave us is by making us wish for what doesn’t exist or isn’t meant for us. 

Professor and author Alan Noble says, "The Christian life is not a call to escape the world but to live in it attentively, bearing witness to the truth." (Alan Noble, Disruptive Witness) We must teach our children to use screens sparingly, wisely, and purposely. Screens are meant to enhance creativity, learning, and spiritual growth—rather than becoming masters of our attention and desire.

This mastery over technology rather than by technology resonates with Christ's words in Mark 2:27 when He declared that "the Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath." Similarly, screens were made to serve humanity, not the other way around. When we find ourselves or our children unable to put devices down, responding emotionally to their absence, or experiencing "phantom vibrations" when they're not even present, we've moved from mastery to servitude.

In his alarming and well-researched book "The Anxious Generation," social psychologist Jonathan Haidt presents compelling evidence about how smartphone use and social media have contributed to a mental health crisis among today's youth. Haidt writes, "The smartphone rewired the lives of teenagers in ways that made them both more connected but less socially developed, more entertained but less happy, more informed but more anxious, never alone but rarely deeply connected." His research shows that Gen Z—the first generation raised with smartphones from childhood—has experienced dramatic increases in anxiety, depression, and self-harm that correlate directly with digital immersion. We will talk more about Haidt’s research in upcoming posts. 

Remember that Christ called us to be "in the world but not of the world" (John 17:14-19). Digital spaces are part of the world our children will navigate, but they shouldn't define or consume them. When children learn to use technology as a tool rather than turn to it as a comfort, distraction, or identity, they develop a Christ-centered perspective that will serve them throughout life.

The goal isn't to demonize technology but to domesticate it, to bring it under the lordship of Christ like every other area of life. As parents, we can demonstrate this by asking thoughtful questions before screen use:

• Will this strengthen or weaken my relationship with God and others?

• Is this enhancing my God-given purpose or distracting from it?

• Am I controlling this technology, or is it controlling me?

Conclusion

As I close, I want to make sure it is clear that I am not advocating for an anti-screen position. At the time I am finishing this post, it’s Friday afternoon, so a time of playing video games with my kids is on the horizon. But by teaching our children to ask these questions and modeling healthy digital habits ourselves, we help them develop the spiritual muscles needed to navigate an increasingly screen-dominated world with wisdom and purpose. In doing so, we prepare them not just for technological discernment but for faithful Christian living in all aspects of life.

As we guide our children and ourselves in thoughtful, prayerful use of screens, we rely on God’s grace. Mistakes will happen, but each new day is an opportunity to grow wiser, shaping homes where Christ, not screens, occupies the center.”

Next week, we will look at how to teach our kids discernment in the Digital Age. I am excited to continue the research on this topic, as the primary goal of these blog posts is to help myself be a faithful parent in this area.

Growing up, I loved soccer. You could say I was obsessed. My day, my mood, even my sense of identity would rise and fall depending on how my favorite team played. I remember it annoying my parents, but I didn’t think it was that big of a deal until one day in my early twenties, when my team lost the World Cup final.

I, a grown man, crumbled to the ground in tears.

My wife, who was just my girlfriend at the time, thought it would be a good moment to mess with me. She gently picked me up off the floor for an embrace, which I accepted… until I noticed she was wearing the opposite team’s jersey. So I pushed her away. Yes, I really did that. That was the moment I realized soccer had become more than a hobby. It had become an idol.

It’s been almost twenty years since then, and thankfully, things have changed.

Just this past week, my team lost another important game. But this time, I noticed something different. I had a choice. Would I let the result ruin my day, or could I choose joy regardless of the outcome? In that moment, I looked over and saw my son getting upset while watching the same game. That’s when it hit me. This was a moment to help him learn how to smash idols while they are still on the factory floor.

John Calvin famously said, “Man’s nature, so to speak, is a perpetual factory of idols.” In other words, our hearts are always looking for something to worship, something to cling to as ultimate. And it’s usually not God. It can be sports, money, sex, career, popularity, and sometimes even really good things like our kids, our reputation, or our work in ministry.

Tim Keller puts it like this:

“The human heart takes good things like a successful career, love, material possessions, even family, and turns them into ultimate things. Our hearts deify them as the center of our lives, because we think they can give us significance and security, safety and fulfillment, if we attain them.”

That’s the problem. But what’s the solution? How do we actually smash those idols before they take root? And just as importantly, how do we help our children smash the idols trying to take root in their own little hearts?

1. Identify the False God Behind the Good Gift

To explain this, I want to borrow an illustration from Paul Tripp. In his book Marriage, he talks about weeds in a lawn to describe the Christian life. I’ve used this illustration with my own kids when we’ve talked about idols, and it really helped.

At our house, we get weeds in the yard all the time. After helping me pull them a few times, my kids quickly learned it’s easier to pull a weed with short roots than one that’s been growing for a while. It’s the same with idols. The sooner we recognize them, the easier they are to uproot.

So as parents, it’s important we help our children identify the things they may be tempted to idolize. For my son, it’s sports and video games. For my daughter, it’s her grades. These things aren’t bad, but they can quickly become too important.

And we should remind our kids, and ourselves, that idols are often good things we’ve made into ultimate things. That’s why it helps to ask simple but honest questions like:

• What do I fear losing most?

• What do I run to for comfort or meaning?

These kinds of questions help us, and our kids, spot what’s quietly replacing God as our source of joy and security. Naming the idol is the first step to tearing it down.

2. Replace the Idol with a Greater Love

Tripp’s illustration doesn’t end with pulling weeds. He also talks about planting good seeds. And the same principle applies here. We don’t overcome idols through sheer willpower. We overcome them with worship.

We need to help our kids learn to fix their eyes on Jesus. The goal isn’t just to take something away. It’s to replace it with someone better. We want their hearts to be more captivated by the beauty, sufficiency, and love of Christ than by whatever idol is pulling at them.

Keller says it well:

“Jesus must become more beautiful to your imagination than your idol.”

That means we need to talk about Jesus often. Point our kids to Him in everyday life. Help them see how He satisfies in ways their grades, sports, or friendships never truly can.

3. Practice Rhythms that Reorder Your Loves

Spiritual disciplines aren’t just things we check off a list. They are how God reshapes what we love.

Daily Scripture, prayer, Sabbath rest, and being part of a gospel-centered community are rhythms that slowly but powerfully reorder our hearts. They help us love God more and trust our idols less.

So what kind of seeds can we plant when we are pulling out idols? One simple step we’ve tried as a family is reading passages that show us who Jesus is. Passages like John 10, Colossians 1, or Hebrews 1.

And then we ask questions like:

What about Jesus in this passage is better than what my idol promises me?

Sometimes the conversation is short. Sometimes it’s deeper. But the habit matters. It plants something good in the soil of their hearts, and mine too.

Idols will always be looking for a place to grow. But by God’s grace, we can recognize them early, replace them with a greater love, and build rhythms that point our hearts, and our children’s hearts, back to Jesus.

References

• Calvin, John. Institutes of the Christian Religion, Book 1, Chapter 11, Section 8.

  “Man’s nature, so to speak, is a perpetual factory of idols.”

• Keller, Timothy. Counterfeit Gods: The Empty Promises of Money, Sex, and Power, and the Only Hope That Matters. Dutton, 2009.

  • Quote: “The human heart takes good things like a successful career, love, material possessions, even family, and turns them into ultimate things…”

  • Quote: “Jesus must become more beautiful to your imagination than your idol.”

• Tripp, Paul David. What Did You Expect?: Redeeming the Realities of Marriage. Crossway, 2010.

  • Illustration of weeds and planting seeds adapted from Tripp’s discussion of spiritual formation in relationships.

As a pastor, I have yet to meet a Christian who is satisfied with their prayer life. As a Christian myself, I know I could grow in this area too. I understand what the Bible teaches, and I believe prayer is essential. Still, I also know how easily my prayer life can be disrupted by the smallest inconvenience.As a parent, I have found that teaching children to pray is not easy. It can even feel hypocritical at times because prayer is something I continue to struggle with. But I believe that helping our children learn to pray is one of the greatest gifts we can give them.

Lately, I have been asking how I can help my own kids succeed in this area. How can I model prayer as something they grow into, rather than grow out of? These reflections are what I hope to share with other parents who may feel the same tension.

Start with simple, shared moments of prayer. When children regularly hear and participate in short, honest prayers, they begin to understand that talking to God can be as natural as talking to a friend. The goal is not to make prayer a burden but to help it become a joyful habit, just as Paul encouraged in Philippians 4:6 and 1 Thessalonians 5:17.

1. Establish a Consistent Time and Place for Prayer

Prayer needs a regular spot in the family’s routine. Donald Whitney reminds us that spiritual growth happens through steady, daily habits. Children, in particular, thrive when there is structure.

Choose a time that works best for your family. This could be in the morning, around the dinner table, or right before bed. Also, pick a place in the house where prayer can happen consistently. Daniel prayed three times a day, kneeling at the same window each time (Daniel 6:10). Jesus would often rise early in the morning and go to a quiet place to pray (Mark 1:35). These examples show how routine helps us prioritize God.

In our home, we pray together after evening devotions. We sit on the couch, read a short passage, talk about it, and then pray. It is not complicated, but it creates space for God in our family life.

Justin Whitmel Earley once said, “Our habits won’t change God’s love for us, but God’s love for us can and should change our habits.” A regular prayer routine is not about earning God’s favor. It is about helping our hearts grow more aware of His presence.

Practical idea: Create a prayer chart or set a daily reminder. Even young children can help by ringing a bell at prayer time or picking a verse to pray.

Why it matters: A consistent prayer time teaches children that God comes first. It also pushes back against the idea that prayer only happens when we have extra time.

2. Ground Your Child’s Prayers in Scripture

One of the best ways to teach children to pray is by helping them pray God’s words back to Him. The Reformers and the Puritans often said that prayer is shaped and nourished by Scripture. The Psalms are a great starting place, and the Lord’s Prayer in Matthew 6 offers a simple but rich structure.

Burk Parsons encourages parents to let children hear and repeat the Lord’s Prayer, even when they are young. You can focus on just one line. For example, start with “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name,” and talk about what it means to honor God during the school day or in the home.

E. M. Bounds once wrote, “The Word of God is the food by which prayer is nourished and made strong.” You can help your child pray a Bible story back to God or memorize a verse like 1 Thessalonians 5:18, which says, “Give thanks in all circumstances.” If your child is older, try using a journal. Read a verse together and turn it into a short prayer. This helps them see that prayer is more than asking for things. It is a way to respond to God’s voice.

Practical idea: Use a children’s Bible or the prayer prompts in our 36 Days in John Devotional during prayer time.

Why it matters: Scripture gives children strong and beautiful words to use in prayer. When they learn to pray from the Bible, they begin to care about what matters to God.

3. Encourage Simple, Honest, Heartfelt Prayers

Help your child see that prayer is not complicated. It is simply talking to God. Nancy Guthrie puts it this way: “Praying to God is so simple a child can do it, but grown-ups often make it needlessly complicated. God wants an honest conversation.”

Children do not need fancy language. I have noticed in my own life, if I’m not careful I pray as if I were in a Sunday service and this can actually discourage my kids from joining in. So during our family prayer time, I try to pray simply and directly. If your child only says one sentence or a single word, thank God with them and affirm it.

Martin Luther once said, “Prayer is not performance but climbing up to the heart of God.” A sincere and childlike prayer is precious to the Lord, even if it seems messy or short to us.

Practical idea: Celebrate small prayers. If your child says, “Thank You, Jesus,” say “Amen” with joy. You can also start a bedtime tradition where you gently pray a blessing over your child’s head, such as, “Lord, help [Name] be brave and kind tomorrow.”

Why it matters: When children know that God values their words, they will feel more confident and eager to pray. This leads to genuine love for God, not just a habit done out of duty.

4. Model God-Centered, Not Me-Centered Prayer

One of the most important things we can model is that prayer is about God, not just about us. If children mostly hear us ask for better grades, good weather, or more rest, they may begin to think that God exists to serve our comfort. But Jesus taught us to pray, “Your kingdom come, Your will be done” (Matthew 6:10).

David Mathis reminds us that prayer is about communion with God, not controlling our circumstances. If our children hear us praise God for who He is—His love, justice, patience—and if they hear us pray for others, for the church, and for the gospel, they will begin to see that prayer is focused on God’s glory.

Donald Whitney writes, “The Bible teaches that prayer should be primarily God-centered, not man-centered.” Of course, we can and should bring our needs to God. Jesus invites us to ask for our daily bread. But we want to help our children learn to seek God’s heart first

Practical idea: During prayer, use the famous ACTS mode which includes 5 simple movements: Adoration, praise for who God is. Confession of sin,Thanksgiving, and Supplication which is where we requests for help. You can keep each one short and simple.

Why it matters: Children naturally focus on themselves (and if we’re honest, adults aren’t much different). Praying in a God-centered way helps them learn that life is not about getting what they want. It is about becoming more like Jesus.

As you help your children learn to pray, remember this. You are not just teaching them how to talk to God. You are helping them understand why we talk to Him. Prayer is about knowing and loving our Father in heaven. Let your words, your example, and your daily rhythms point their hearts toward the God who listens.

Prayer is not a task to complete. It is a relationship to enjoy. By making prayer a regular part of family life, grounding it in Scripture, and keeping it heartfelt and God-centered, you are helping your children grow in the joy of walking with God. As Nancy Guthrie’s children’s book reminds us, “God wants us to talk to Him.” And the Bible tells us in Psalm 145:18 that He is near to all who call on Him.

To find some of the resources mentioned in the article and that we recommend to parents who want to grow in the area of prayer with their children, please click below:

Book Recommendations on Prayer

Citations

• Donald S. Whitney, Family Worship, Crossway, 2016.

• Justin Whitmel Earley, The Common Rule: Habits of Purpose for an Age of Distraction, IVP, 2019.

• Burk Parsons, “Teach Us to Pray,” Tabletalk Magazine, Ligonier Ministries, June 2016.

• E.M. Bounds, The Necessity of Prayer, Whitaker House, 2006 (originally published in 1907).

• Nancy Guthrie, What Every Child Should Know About Prayer, 10Publishing, 2017.

• Martin Luther, quoted in A Simple Way to Pray, Fortress Press, 2000.

• David Mathis, Habits of Grace: Enjoying Jesus Through the Spiritual Disciplines, Crossway, 2016.

Scripture References:

• Philippians 4:6; 1 Thessalonians 5:17–18; Daniel 6:10; Mark 1:35; Matthew 6:9–13; Matthew 6:10; Psalm 145:18

Hi, I’m Cristian. I’m originally from Guatemala, and by God’s grace, I’ve been pastoring for over 15 years in places as far and wide as Guatemala, Malaysia, and now in Titusville, Florida. Today, I serve as one of the pastors at Trinity Community Church, a local church I deeply love and where everything I do—including this project—finds its starting point.

I’m married to Megan, my best friend and steady encourager. Together we’re raising two wonderful (and wonderfully energetic) kids—Thiago and Norah. Like many of you, we’re navigating the beautiful chaos of parenting with a deep desire to raise our children in the knowledge and love of Jesus.

Digging Deep was born out of a simple but real struggle: I wanted to disciple my kids, but I didn’t always know how to do it consistently. Time felt short. Plans fell through. And too often, family devotions turned into “we’ll try again tomorrow.” So I created something to help us—a Scripture-rich, grace-filled devotional that was actually doable in the rhythm of our daily life. That small project became 36 Days in John.

At first, I designed it with my own family in mind. Then I decided to share it with families in our church. Eventually, I realized it could be a gift to other parents walking a similar road—busy, tired, but longing to lead their kids closer to Christ.

Everything I write and share here is rooted in the local church. Trinity is my home, my priority, and the place I get to walk alongside real families every week. This Substack is simply an overflow—an offering of encouragement, tools, and truth for others who want to dig deep into God’s Word and plant seeds of faith in the next generation.

Thanks for being here. I hope what you find on Digging Deep helps you slow down, open your Bible, and see Jesus more clearly—together as a family.

Grace and peace,

Cristian Moscoso

As a pastor and a father of two, I know how hard it can be to find time for meaningful spiritual conversations at home. Mornings are rushed. Bedtime can feel chaotic. And even when we want to lead our kids toward Jesus, we’re often unsure where to start—or what to say.

To be honest, this all started out of my own personal struggle. I desperately wanted to lead regular devotions with my family, but I found myself constantly scrambling for a plan. I’d miss days, lose momentum, or feel overwhelmed with trying to piece something together on the spot. So I sat down and created something simple—something that would help my family stay consistent in God’s Word, with a plan that was both theologically grounded and realistically doable.

At the same time, our church is going through a sermon series on the Gospel of John. As a pastor, I was already marinating in this gospel—week after week, studying and preaching through it. I began to realize just how rich and relational John’s account of Jesus really is. It’s full of personal conversations, vivid images, and clear declarations of who Jesus is. It was exactly the kind of gospel I wanted to walk through with my children.

So I wrote 36 Days in John first with my family in mind. I thought I’d share it with my family, then with the families in our local church. And finally, I realized this might be a helpful tool for other parents too—parents like me, trying to be faithful in the middle of real life.

What’s Inside Each Day?

Every devotional follows a simple, repeatable format that makes it easy to use whether you’ve got five minutes or fifteen.

📖Scripture Reading

Each day begins with a short passage from the Gospel of John. We encourage you to read it aloud with your child—forming the habit of hearing God’s Word together.

🧠Devotional

This section explains the passage in a way that’s accessible for kids without losing theological depth. It’s written with warmth and clarity, offering insights that will encourage both children and parents as you discover Jesus together.

🤓Fun Fact

Kids love fun details! Whether historical, cultural, or surprising, each fact adds a layer of curiosity to keep your child engaged.

💬Think About It

Reflection questions at the end encourage conversation and help connect God’s Word to your child’s world.

🙏Prayer

A brief, guided prayer helps your child respond to the truth they’ve heard. It models how to talk to God simply and sincerely.

Why John?

The Gospel of John is uniquely relational. It invites us to see Jesus up close—His miracles, His “I AM” statements, His conversations with seekers and skeptics, His prayer for His people. And John tells us exactly why he wrote his Gospel: “so that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name”(John 20:31). That’s what I want for my children too—not just to learn about Jesus, but to know Him, trust Him, and walk with Him.

A Tool for Real Life

This devotional isn’t perfect—neither is my parenting. But 36 Days in John was written to meet real families in real rhythms. Whether you’re gathered around the breakfast table, sitting in the carpool line, or winding down before bed, I hope this devotional gives you a way to slow down, open Scripture, and fix your family’s eyes on Christ.

If you’re a parent who wants to disciple your children but struggles to stay consistent, this was made for you. My hope is that it helps take the pressure off, brings gospel joy into your home, and gives you a sense of purpose and peace as you lead your family.

Let’s keep digging deep—into God’s Word, into our kids’ hearts, and into the grace that makes all of it possible.

Cristian Moscoso
Creator of Digging Deep Family Resources

Buy Devotional now

Get a free sample